In life, you get just about as many chances as you’re willing to take.

If you’re going to be original, be prepared to be copied.

Be with someone who is proud to have you.

Eat whatever you want, and if anyone tries to lecture you about your weight, eat them too.

I am constantly putting things where they don’t belong, like the cereal in the fridge or my keys in the laundry or my faith in other people.

“I have enough clothes and shoes I never will need to go shopping again…” – Said by no girl ever.

Be with someone who brings out the best in you, not the stress in you!

Disney should make a new princess with no hair, so that every little girl who is fighting cancer knows she’s beautiful.

Never get too attached to anyone, unless they also feel the same towards you, because one-sided expectations can mentally destroy you.

Don’t rush things. Keep it calm, Anything worth having is worth waiting for.

your beliefs don’t make you a better person. Your actions do!

Women drivers are like stars; you can see them, but they can’t see you.

I hate it when people call me funny because i feel like i have to say something really funny again, and I just can’t handle that pressure.

If you are cooler than me doesn’t that make me hotter than you?

If a girl is stupid enough to love you after you broke her heart, that’s guaranteed. She is the one…

Coughing in front of smokers to make them feel guilty.:D

The only sane people on this world are the ones who admit they are crazy! ;)

Winners never quit , Quitters never win ..

You never really know where that first “Hi” will take you!

A relationship works best when both person believes they have got better than they deserve!

Whoever said, “money doesn’t grow on trees” has obviously never sold weed.

If you think, you have a boring life, just remember there is someone out there somewhere typing ‘terms and conditions’.

Some people are like Boomerangs; you throw them away from your life, but they just keep coming back.

Admit it, you’re afraid to text him/her first sometimes because you feel like you are annoying them.

Love is sweet when its new …. But its sweetest … when it’s true ;)

Old people used to annoy me at weddings by tapping my head and saying I was next. They stopped when I started doing it to them at funerals.

If someone says you are “one in a million” They are telling you that there are 7,038 people like you. How is this a compliment?

A quiet man denotes as a thinking man …. A quiet women always denotes as an angry woman.

We are just one step away from being rich, all we need now is money…

To my dad: Just because we have the same last name doesn’t mean we have to be Facebook’s friends.

Smile – It makes a world of difference. Dance – Who knows when you won’t be able to. Cry – Holding those emotions.

When The Hulk goes off into a vicious rage and destroys everything, he’s “Incredible.” But when I do it, I’m, “an alcoholic.”

Remember the days .. when girls used to post pics with cute smiles …. Instead of DUCK FACES. Good old days